Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Back in the Swing of Things After a Relapse (Food, Drugs, Alcohol or Sin)

Here it is, Wednesday, and I am weighing in again. This Monday was the first week that I have really decided to get back on Weight Watchers since my cruise. I have tried several times and several ways to get back on track, but it has been difficult. I allowed myself to relapse on food during the cruise with a guarantee that I would go back on Weight Watchers when I got back home. I have not yet been able to get back on track. The more I looked at how difficult it was, the more I remembered how hard it was with my other addictions.

The funny thing is, this is only counting points. I am still allowed to eat unheatlhy on occasion, and yet I was still failing until this week. I did really well with it until the cruise, then I allowed myself to slip. Now I am reminded of the mantra repeated in group, "One is too many and a thousand is never enough." Once I opened the door to let bad eating habits in for a week, the door never closed.

Our lives are not only this way with food. Our lives are this way with alcohol, drugs, pornography, lying, cheating (tests or partners), stealing, gossiping, flirting, etc. If we give ourselves permission for a little, a lot can happen. We may justify it, but it does not change what it is. A relapse is a relapse, and it can quickly spiral out of control. No matter what we say about it, that is what it is. A white lie is still that, a lie! Flirting can get out of hand really quick, and innocent words can still destroy a relationship.

I am reminded of a quote from Romeo and Juliet, "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet." When Shakespeare said that he meant that no matter what you call something, it is still the same thing. Renaming a thing does not change what it really is. To cut down on confusion, I have a rule that changed my life you can apply here. I will share it in depth in the next week, but here is the gist of it. Ask yourself two questions before you do an action. If the answer to both is yes, then do it. If either of the answers is no, you do not do it.

Question 1 is this, "If my child (or significant other) and God were standing next to me, would I still do this?" If you answer yes, than you ask yourself this question, "Is this something that I would want my child (or significant other) to do. If that answer is also yes, then you can proceed. If either question is answered with a no, then you cannot do it. It is that simple, and yet it helped save my life.

So what door have you opened to sin, thinking that a cracked door will not harm you. "I am strong enough to do it only once." If you let yourself wander to one porn site on the computer, that is still cheating. You may not look at it that way, but the Bible does. Matthew 5:28 says, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Tell me that we do not look at porn sites, or flirt with anyone, without some form of lust. Gossip is the same way. 

In fact, any type of sin is that way. A sin is a sin, no matter what I call it. Just because I say it isn't water doesn't mean I won't get wet if I jump into it! Furthermore, it tends to hurt not only us but we also hurt others. We need to remember what was talked about last week in my blog on loving your neighbor as yourself. Treat others better than you would want them to treat your children. Would you want someone on a site ogling your son or daughter? No, then do not ogle someone else's son or daughter.

So, examine how we treat others and how we treat ourselves. Realize that there is no difference between our spiritual time and our secular time. If I would not do it or say it in church, I should not do it or say it outside of church. I'm not judging, I'm just saying. If only God can judge me, I can still judge myself too. I know right from wrong, and I need to examine all that I say and do so that I do not give the Devil a gateway into my life.

Once Satan (sin, alcohol, drugs, porn) gets into my life, he is difficult to get back out. If I give him just a little, he is sure to take a lot. Many of us who have relapsed have found out that it generally picks up worse than when we stopped using. We need to insure that we are doing all that we can to keep the door shut for good. If you look back to my posts entitled Iron Sharpens Iron you can see that even the places that we frequent and the company we keep can be open doors for our defects to take back over.

You always have a choice, but will you make the right one? Only you can answer that. I guarantee you that the Holy Spirit will guide you in the right direction (positive people, positive places, positive choices) if you allow it to!

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