Monday, January 30, 2012

Thank God for Rap

I know that for a lot of traditional Christians, rap is synonymous with everything evil. When I say rap the first thing that you think of is beats overlaid with lyrics about sex, drugs, violence and gangs. At one time I would have agreed with you. In my addiction, that is why I listened to rap. I could relate to what I was listening to. I lived as a drug dealer and a soldier of Satan.

I would listen to gangster rap and heavy metal. That was what I fed myself, and as the saying goes "Garbage In Garbage Out."I was always angry and violent. There was no pleasing me, I was one of the most unhappy people that you would meet, unless I was jacked up on meth (which was all of the time). Then I was pretty happy unless I had been up for several days, which happened every week. For years I stayed up for six days and slept on Sundays. The music contributed to my mood, and I listened to music I could relate to.


Today at the gym I listened to rap once again. I listened to LeCrae, who has songs entitled "Jesus Muzik" and "Prayin for You." I also had Tedashii "I'm a Believer" and Trip Lee "Cash or Christ" playing on my IPhone. Those are a couple of the song titles that I listened to this morning as I worked out. I bumped music that motivated me and at the same time uplifted me.

I left feeling exhausted physically and happy spiritually. I walked out of the gym uplifted and positive with what I can only call an optimistic attitude. This will translate into my having a great day at work and a great meeting after work with one of the guys working on our IT issues for Better Life in Recovery. I am excited to see how the web site is coming along, but that is another blog.

Bottom line: Rap has changed, and it has come a long way from DC Talk. It is better than the secular stuff out there for several reasons.

  1. It glorifies and promotes Jesus Christ, not the entertainer
  2. It is uplifting 
  3. It is about positive situations and choices, not dead end choices and lifestyles
  4. I would listen to it with my 4 year old and not worry about him repeating lyrics in school
  5. It is music that brings me closer to Christ

Monday, January 23, 2012

The Anniverary of Roe vs Wade: Why I Am Now Pro-Life

My son asked me a question last night. If he would have asked me the same question 2 months ago he would have gotten a different answer. He asked me to name the 5 people I love most. Two months ago the answer would have been God, Julie (my wife), him, my sister Michal and her daughter/my son's cousin/my niece Kelly. Last night, though, I told him God, Julie, him, his unborn brother/sister and my sister Michal.

Two months ago I found out that my wife was pregnant, and we were both overjoyed. At this time she was 4 weeks pregnant. She had a life inside of her. The heart of her fetus had already begun to beat. Blood was already beginning to flow through the vessels and arms and legs are already becoming visible. This is at the 4th and 5th weeks of gestation when the fetus is only 1 and 2 weeks old.

When I talked to my wife about my conversation with my son last night, she told me that yesterday was the anniversary of Roe versus Wade. It made me remember how I once felt. At one time, I fully thought that I had no right to say anything, since I was a man. Now that I am a father, however, I feel completely different. I would not even want to imagine my life without my son in it. Neither would I want to rob the world of my son, who is amazing and kind and intelligent.

I am pro-life now because I could not possibly imagine my son not living. I do not want to visualize a world without him in it. In the case of my unborn child, I could not imagine terminating a fetus with a heartbeat. To me that is murder. There is a heartbeat, and that is an innocent life. There will be some disagreements, and I will address the most recent one that I had here.

I have a friend that is an atheist, but is very involved in public service. She volunteers time with various non-profits, most of which goes to the American Cancer Society since her mother died from cancer several years ago. She and I had the discussion, because she has had an abortion.

"It did not hurt anybody. I chose to have an abortion because my mother had just died and I could not deal with raising a baby with everything else going on."

I asked her one question that stopped her cold in the conversation. "Your choice could have hurt everyone! What if the baby you terminated was going to cure cancer? What if she would have been the diplomat that forged world peace, or raised the child that accomplished it? We might aleady have a cure for AIDS and cancer if we did not abort babies."

"I never thought about it like that," was her reply.

I know that this is a very difficult issue to discuss. I am not one to cast stones at anyone. I just wanted to share my most recent thoughts on the issue. I feel that there are many things we do that are wrong ethically, morally and spiritually. Abortion is one of those things. I have heard the claim abortion doesn't hurt anyone, As a substance abuse counselor I deal with a lot of women who have carried the guilt of abortion with them for years. Simply thinking about it a decade later instantly brings them to tears, and I would not wish that kind of traumatic pain on anyone.

The truth is, there are far reaching consequences for both the person getting the abortion and the child that never got to grow. What if Martin Luther King, Jr.s mother would have aborted him? What if Marie Curie and Alexander Fleming had been aborted? What if your mother had aborted you, or the mother of your spouse had aborted them? The truth is, abortion is the killing of potential. We truly never know what could have been when abortion occurs. And "what if" is one of the hardest questions to live life without an answer for.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Celebrate Recovery Testimony 01/19/2012

Ridgecrest Baptist Church Pt.1

                                                       Ridgecrest Baptist Church Pt.2

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

PRAYER Pt. 2: Why Should I Pray

Before we get any further into how to pray, when to pray and the different types of prayer we should probably find out why we pray. Is it just there as a way for us to ask for the things we want, forgiveness for the things we do and healing for ourselves and the people that we care about? As a Christian, why do I pray?

I personally pray because I love God and I want to have conversations with Him and constantly remind Him that I depend on Him. I pray to ask his guidance, His blessing upon me and to open others hearts and ears to His message. I also pray for others. For some I pray that they become open to recieving Christ in their lives. For others I pray for health and healing from various afflictions: cancer, depression, addiction, divorce, anger, etc.

Mostly I pray to thank Him for the promise of eternal salvation, for the grace I have recieved, that His will be done and that I have the ability to be His hands and feet and represent Him in all that I do during my walk on Earth. That is why I pray. What does the Bible have to say about why we pray?

Matthew 26:41 says, "“Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” We are to pray so that we may have strength not to fall into temptation. When thoughts of relapse or sin come into my mind one of the surest ways to ward them off is to begin praying for strength.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 says that we are to constantly pray "without ceasing." If prayer is that important to our lives that we should do it all of the time, then that is another great reason why we should pray. Sin and the Devil never take a day off. They will try to defeat us at every corner. A great way to ward them off is to have an ongoing conversation with God. It is like having your own personal entourage of bouncers with you where ever you go to ward of Satan and the thoughts he plants in our heads.

John 15:16 says, "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you." This means that when we have needs we are to come to God with them in prayer. The things that we need we will be given. Sometimes what we pray for will not be given and we may wonder why, but that is a question that will be looked at more later in this series.

James 1:5 says, "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." So when we have quandries in our lives, we are to pray for insight and understanding so that we can do the right thing. God guides us towards making the right decision and showing us the way He wants things done in our lives.

In Ephesians 3:14-21 Paul prays for the entire congregation, asking that God strengthen them with the Holy Spirit and that Christ would dwell in their hearts. He also asked that they gain comprehension of the depth and power of Christ's love and that it fill them. Following this example, we should pray for other people. Whether our prayer for them is for health, gaining a relationship with Christ or strength and wisdom in trying times.

Matthew 11:28 says that prayer eases those "who are weary and burdened" while 1 Peter 5:7 says that we should "cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." Philippians 4:6-7 tells us that if we pray, the "peace of God will guard our hearts and our minds." In the

As you can see, there are a myriad of reasons that we should pray. First and foremost is that we are to be Christ-like, and Christ prayed all of the time. He even instructed us how to pray in Matthew 6, and we will get to that later in this series. We should pray to keep that constant contact with God in this sinful world. This world is not my home, I am merely visiting. Here is the main reason why we should pray.

Imagine that you are in a deep sea diving suit. The suit itself offers protection but you need more than just the suit. As you are suited up you have a helmet that attaches which contains a line that runs back to the surface. That line from the ship gives you oxygen and allows you to communicate any difficulties that arise so that they may be taken care of. The reason for that need is simple, the ocean is not your natural home.

Much like the ocean, sin is not what we were born to live surrounded by. As we are immersed in this world of sin, spiritually we begin to choke. We have a suit that can keep us safe, and those are the fruits of the spirit that we gird ourselves with. That is not enough, we still need contact with God. Prayer is the line that rises from our suit to the surface. If we lose contact with Him we are cut off. We are not being given life supporting oxygen, nor are we being given the calming presence of God. Simply knowing He is there is enough to help us stay calm and not panic when stressful situations occur.  We can survive spiritually in this world if we have that contact with God. If we do not, we will surely perish. Sin will become my lifestyle and spiritually I will die.


Sunday, January 15, 2012

Top 10 Reasons People Hate Tebow

Last night I was watching the UFC fights. My sincerest apologies go out to Tim, Tom, the Broncos and the Patriots. I am a Chicago Bears fan, and I figured the fights would be more interesting. I have been a huge fan of the UFC since it began, and I was excited to see a couple of the fights. That and I already had plans to have people over to my house for the pay per view.

What I did do was follow the game on my Yahoo! Sportacular IPhone app. I generally follow the chat that goes on during the game on the app too, and it was horrific. There was so many disparaging words that I knew I was not home on the range. They started before the game even began, and as the game continued they got worse. It is amazing that a quarterback has set multiple high school records, won the Heisman trophy as a sophomore and took his team to two national championships but is repeatedly called lucky. Lucky happened to be among some of the best remarks that I read in the chat.

As the Broncos fell further and further behind, the bad mouthing continued to deteriorate. Wow, I had not seen this much vitriol spewed at a man since Obama was elected president. People seem pretty quick to share their hate. Sad when it is done to a guy that gets pile driven into the turf and tells the linebacker "Nice Hit." If he was a rapist or a drug peddler I would understand, but he is a man that is trying to open up a children's hospital in the Philippines and whose foundation supports an orphanage. Wish the haters would do as much to help their fellow man!! I'm not judging, just saying.

I figured that there must be some great reasons that people do not like Tim Tebow (There is an I HATE  Tim Tebow group on Facebook) and I made a plausible (to me at least) list of reasons why he is so disliked:

  1. Tim Tebow does not do drugs (C'mon, We need a role model. If you can't lead your team in drug arrests how can you be a team leader?)
  2. Tim Tebow has never had a DWI or been arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct (Must not appreciate his wins enough to get drunk and then drive when celebrating them)
  3. Tim Tebow has never been convicted or even charged with any felonies (He is too soft for the NFL!)
  4. Tim Tebow doesn't raise pit bulls to fight or even run a dog fighting ring (He hates animals so much he will not let them compete)
  5. Tim Tebow visits children in hospitals and makes terminally ill kids wishes come true (To mock and belittle them when no one is looking, I'm sure)
  6. Tim Tebow has never been seen in a bar fight (What a WUSS!!)
  7. Tim Tebow doesn't sleep around or spread STD's (Tim Tebow is selfish and does not share)
  8. Tim Tebow does not cuss and is a role model for children (Quit making so many other athletes look bad. How can we say we are not supposed to be role models when he is such a great one)
  9. Tim Tebow is building a hospital in the Philippines for children (It's in the Philippines because he hates America, not because he was born there)
  10. Tim Tebow has no visible tattoos (He must be afraid of pain)
  11. Tim Tebow represents a great ethical and moral standard of living ie Tim Tebow has values (I could never parent that good of a kid, stop making me look bad Tim)
  12. Tim Tebow doesn't beat women (I got nothing for this one, I tried but could not come up with a reason to hate on him him for this no matter how hard I had to stretch it. This one is just simply not in the least bit funny.)
The bottom line is this; Tim Tebow IS a role model for our children (at least for mine). If my son graduates from high school and then goes to college and the worst thing people can say about him is that he is a lucky quarterback and too open about his faith than I will consider myself one blessed parent! I look at how many of the professional athletes are getting arrested for drug possession, DWI, rape, assault and child molestation and it hurts me. Many children look up to these people and want to be just like them. At least he lives a life worth imitating!

Tim Tebow is a man who volunteers and donates loads of time and money and has never been attached to a crime or scandal. He is a role model in every sense of the term and he is hated on? If I was an atheist or agnostic (which I once was) I could still use how he acts in his life as an example to my son. I would talk to my son about why he represents his beliefs so openly and encourage my son to do the same with his beliefs. Don't hate, emulate!!

P.S. - Shout out to Edson Barboza for one of the coolest knock outs ever. Then mad props to Barboza for giving all glory to Christ. Classy guy, and just like Tebow I bet that he would have prayed in defeat too. We know we get more strength and wisdom from the loses than the wins!

Saturday, January 14, 2012

The Longer I'm In Recovery

I shot one more interview for the documentary this morning then took my wife to worship team practice. We are shooting a friends testimony for her tomorrow so that she can have it to give to potential speaking venues so they can hear what she will bring to their audiences. I am meeting with my web designer Monday, my accountability partner on Wednesday and giving my testimony at Ridgecrest Baptist Church on Thursday. All week I work as a substance abuse counselor peddling hope while watching clients rebuild clean and sober lives. My life is recovery, and my life is amazing. It used to be filled with depression and anger as a soldier for Satan, now it is positive and optimistic with a focus on Christ.

There is a reason for that positivity and optimism. That reason is simple. I know what hell looks like and how it feels to wish for death. I have been to those places. I have seen demons and heard them scream in my ear. That was my past. Now I know what it is to be filled with love and guided by the Holy Spirit. I now want to live. That is all possible because I chose to turn my life over to Christ in a moment of need. I had tried everything but Christ, and they had all failed. With God, all things are possible.

Now I have a new lease on life; an outlook on my day that makes people like to be around me. I can now be a good example for others to follow and share with them a story of God's unimaginable grace. I feel that is my duty; to share my past addictions and defects as well as my recovery and how it occurred. The longer that I am in recovery, the louder my voice should be. It is not to be forgotten where I came from and how I got to where I am today. In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul says that he boasts about his weaknesses, hardships, difficulties and persecutions. So do I.

That is what my testimony and life are. I get to show others that there is a better life in recovery. The longer that I am in recovery, the stronger and wiser I become. It is my responsibility to share that strength and wisdom with others. For years I took from society, and the further in my addiction I got the more I took. Therefore, the longer I am clean and sober the more I owe back. I got a second chance at life (more like an 8th chance. I must be a cat to have this many lives) and it is wasted if I don't use it to help others!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

PRAYER Pt. 1: Definition of Prayer

I guess that the best way to start off a series on prayer would be to define prayer. After all, it is hard to talk about something if we do not have a good idea what exactly we are talking about. So, what is prayer? Here are the definitions found on
  1. a devout petition to God or an object of worship.
  2. a spiritual communion with God or an object of worship, as in supplication, thanksgiving, adoration,  or confession.
  3. the act or practice of praying to God or an object of worship.
  4. a formula or sequence of words used in or appointed for praying: the Lord's Prayer.
  5. prayers, a religious observance, either public or private, consisting wholly or mainly of prayer.
Over the course of this series we are going to talk about the Christian concept of prayer. So we can rule out object of worship. Based on several scriptures we can also rule out formula or sequence of words. Honestly these definitions work, but not well. To learn about the concept of prayer to God, we should see what He says about it in His Living Word. So, what does the Bible say about prayer?

1 John 5:14-15 says, "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of Him."

1 Thessalonians 5:17 says, "Pray continually."

John 16:23, "In that day you will no longer ask me anything. Very truly I tell you, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name."

We have made prayer much more complicated yet easier than it needs to be. I know that I suffer from this. I have no problem praying on my own, but get really nervous when I am praying outloud in the midst of others. I get nervous when I pray over food if the table has people I do not know at it. It is even more nerve-wracking for me when I am doing intercessory prayer (praying on behalf of someone else) in a group or I am praying with someone else out loud.

Prayer should not be this way. Prayer is not that difficult a thing to do, but in order to do it it must be understood. I fear things that I do not know or understand well. Math and spiders are the two examples I have. One of them I do not understand well, and the other I have never had any reason to learn about. Therefore I am intimidated and scared by them. I no longer want to be intimidated by prayer. 

This series is an opportunity for me to learn more about what prayer is and share that knowledge with you. It is me realizing that not only do I not know enough about prayer, but that I am pretty sure I do not pray often enough and need to pray more. But in order to pray, I should understand what prayer is. So what is my definition of prayer?

Prayers are frequent conversations of meaning and purpose with our Heavenly Father in the name of His Son Jesus Christ that are sincere and filled with an attitude of gratitude, reverence, love, faith, humility and thanksgiving which allows us to let our needs be known while deepening our relationship with God.

The bottom line is this: Prayer IS an ongoing  conversation with God. Plain and simple, prayer is talking to God. Imagine having God on speed dial, "Siri, call Jehovah." Instantly, I have God on the other end and I can have a conversation with him where I pour my heart out. Just like your best friend, you should want to talk to God over the course of the day and share your life with Him. Prayer is showing that you are dependent on God. You are confiding in God, building your relationship and letting Him know that you need Him. Not praying is trying to live independent of God, telling Him that you don't want Him and you don't need Him.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Our Father Who Art in Heaven: Gimmee, Gimmee, Gimmee PRAYER Pt. 0.5

It seems that we have a lot of people who no longer pray. They have stopped praying because they do not get their prayers answered. The reason for this is that they are praying wrong. I know what you are thinking, that there is no wrong way to pray. But there is, and many have forgotten the how and why of it. Most of us start our prayer with our hands open and we end prayer with our hands open. We expect God to give, give, give and we are offering nothing in return.

Then there are the prayer habits that many of us have. We may only pray first thing in the morning or again in the evening, plus with our meals. Some of us may only pray at our meals if someone is watching, and others may only pray when people are not. We probably only set aside a couple of minutes every day to pray, never praying for long periods of times. Prayer is hard work and it is time consuming. If we only are praying when it is convenient for us or so that others may see us, we are praying wrong!

This is the beginning of a series on prayer that will be ongoing the next several weeks. Each week we will look at another piece of the prayer puzzle. Among what we will be looking at are: what is prayer, how are we to pray, how often are we to pray, why should we pray and why are my prayers not answered. That said, we will also look at the opposite of these questions. If there are things we should do, then there are things that we should not do.

My hope is that this coming series, although merely an overview, will be able to get you thinking about prayer. It will allow you to begin examining your prayer life, how and when you pray and the reasoning behind your prayer. We are not called to be comfortable, but to be ever vigilant. Prayer should be as needed for our spiritual life as air is for our physical life. If it isn't, then I am hoping that this series will make us question how we are living our lives and insure that we make prayer a major gear in our daily functioning.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

What If God Answered Your Prayer (This is borrowed and humorous but true)

The Lord's Prayer (God's voice is Highlighted)

Our Father Who Art In Heaven .
Don't interrupt me . I'm praying .
But -- you called  - ME!
Called you?
No, I didn't call you .
I'm praying . 

Our Father who art in Heaven .
There -- you did it again!
Did what?
Called ME .
You said,
"Our Father who art in Heaven"
Well, here I am . . . .
What's on your mind?
But I didn't mean anything by it .
I was, you know, just saying my prayers for the day .
I always say the Lord's Prayer .
It makes me feel good,
kind of like fulfilling a duty .
Well, all right .
Go on

Okay, Hallowed be thy name .
Hold it right there . What do you mean by that?
By what?
By "Hallowed be thy name"? 
It means, it means . . good grief,   
I don't know what it means .
How in the world should I know?
It's just a part of the prayer .
By the way, what does it mean? 
It means honored, holy, wonderful .
Hey, that makes sense . .   
I never thought about what 'hallowed' meant before .
Thanks . 

Thy Kingdom come,
Thy will be done,
on earth as it is in Heaven .
Do you really mean that?
Sure, why not?
What are you doing about it?
Doing? Why, nothing, I guess . 
I just think it would be kind of neat if you got   
control, of everything down here like you have up   
there .   We're kinda in a mess down here you know .
Yes, I know; but, have I got control of you?
Well, I go to church .
That isn't what I asked you .
What about your bad temper?
You've really got a problem there, you know .
And then there's the way you spend 
your money -- all on yourself .
And what about the kind of books you read ?
Now hold on just a minute!
Stop picking on me!
I'm just as good as some of the rest 
of those People at church! 
Excuse ME . .
I thought you were praying
for my will to be done .
If that is to happen,
it will have to start with the ones
who are praying for it .
Like you -- for example .
Oh, all right . I guess I do have some hang-ups . 
Now that you mention it,
I could probably name some others .
So could I .
I haven't thought about it very much until now, 
but I really would like to cut out some of those things .
I would like to, you know, be really free .
Good .
Now we're getting somewhere . 
We'll work together -- You and  ME . 
I'm proud of You .
Look, Lord, if you don't mind,
I need to finish up here .
This is taking a lot longer than it usually does . 

Give us this day, our daily bread .
You need to cut out the bread . . You're overweight as it is .
Hey, wait a minute! What is this?
Here I was doing my religious duty,
and all of a sudden you break in
and remind me of all my hang-ups .
Praying is a dangerous thing .
You just might get what you ask for .
Remember, you called ME -- and here I am .
It's too late to stop now .
Keep praying .   ( pause . . . )
Well, go on .
I'm scared to .
Scared? Of what?
I know what you'll say .
Try ME . 

Forgive us our sins, 
as we forgive those who sin against us . 
What about Ann?
See? I knew it!
I knew you would bring her up!
Why, Lord, she's told lies about me, spread stories .
She never paid back the money she owes me .
I've sworn to get even with her!
But  -- your prayer --What about your prayer?
I didn't -- mean it . .
Well, at least you're honest .
But, it's quite a load carrying around all that 
bitterness and resentment isn't it?
Yes, but I'll feel better as soon as I get even with her .
Boy, have I got some plans for her .
She'll wish she had never been born .
No, you won't feel any better .
You'll feel worse .
Revenge isn't sweet .
You know how unhappy you are --
Well, I can change that .
You can? How?
Forgive Ann .
Then, I'l l forgive you;
And the hate and the sin,
will be Ann's problem -- not yours .
You will have settled the problem
as far as you are concerned .
Oh, you know, you're right .
You always are .
And more than I want revenge,
I want to be right with You . . (sigh) .
All right, all right . .
I forgive her .
How do you feel?
Hmmmm . Well, not bad .
Not bad at all!
In fact, I feel pretty great!
You know, I don't think I'll go to bed uptight tonight .
I haven't been getting much rest, you know .
Yeah, I know .
But, you're not through with your prayer, are you? 
Go on . . . .
Oh, all right . 

And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil .
Good! Good! I'll do that .
Just don't put yourself in a place
where you can be tempted .
What do you mean by that?
You know what I mean .
Yeah . I know .
Okay .
Go ahead . . . Finish your prayer . 

For Thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory forever .
Amen .
Do you know what would bring me glory --  What would really make me happy?
No, but I'd like to know .
I want to please you now . .
I've really made a mess of things . .
I want to truly follow you . . .
I can see now how great that would be .
So, tell me . . .
How do I make you happy?
YOU  just did . 

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Romans 8: If You Have to Justify What You're Doing, Don't Do It!!!


Today I was listening to a client as she sat at lunch and defended her new boyfriend to the people at her table. As I listened, I had an epiphany. If I feel the need to defend and justify my choices and decisions before I am even confronted on them, I probably have made the the wrong choice. This may sound wrong, but let me give you an example.

Imagine I am Client X, and I am single. I have an open case with Children's Division or I am on probation. Maybe I am on probation and have an open case with Children's Division, or maybe I am just fresh into my period of sobriety. I begin dating. The person I am dating is on probation/parole and is sober but has a history with addiction issues.

Everbody else sees this as a problem. I do not. Instead I begin to justify my choice. "Who is _______ (fill in the blank with whoever fits ie judge, probation officer, case worker, your friends and family, etc.) to judge my choices. I am sober, and I expect people to give me the benefit of the doubt." This is followed by, "I don't want people to judge me by my past and always hold it against me. I would not want someone to not date me because of my past." These are my justifications to date people I probably should not, and to me they sound sane.

To others, they have their reasons for being concerned. "So this is the company you choose to keep and have around your children." "What, were there not any better choices out there?"  "Is your dating service" "Why are you drawn to the same type of person over and over. You know how it has always ended in the past!" "Why do you not hold out for better. If you date someone just like you it is easy to relapse, recidivate and backslide."

The truth is, we should want better for ourselves. Maybe this is because I married up and I wish everyone else would do the same. I did not settle for Ms. Right Now, I held out for Ms. Right! The same is true for all of my decisions. Before I make any decision, I ask myself if this is a choice that I am going to have to justify to people. If it is, I DON"T DO IT!!!!

If I am living a moral Christian life, I should not have to justify my choices. I am led by the Spirit in all that I do. I will pray on my choices, and then wait for the whisper of God and the direction of the Holy Spirit to guide me. If God is for me (and behind my choices), then none can stand against them(Romans 8:31). If I know the choice I am compelled to make is because I am acting as the hands and feet of God then I need not justify my choices.

Read the entire 8th Chapter of Romans for more about this. If I live my life based off of what the spirit desires instead of what the flesh desires, I am justified in all that I do. If I am justified in my actions, I do not feel the need to justify my actions.