The Kingdom of More

Welcome to the land of milk and honey, where a 40 inch television screen is not enough. We must have a 100 inch screen in order to enjoy our mind numbing entertainment. We have 100 channels at our disposal backed by 100 DVDs sitting around yet we complain we have nothing to watch. A home with a refrigerator and freezer half filled with food next to two cupboards completely stocked with sustenance yet we have nothing to eat. Water available from the tap 24/7 and we complain there is nothing to drink. A 3 bedroom, 2,000 square foot home and we whine that there is no room. This is the Kingdom of More!

We have all bought into the hedonism, or what Freud called the “pleasure principle.” Basically, we find happiness in things that cause pleasure and tend to avoid things that are not pleasurable. The problem is that the grass is always greener on the other side. We chase happiness through material possessions and things yet they continually make newer and better possessions and things we must chase.

The hedonistic fallacy then occurs. It sees us not finding the happiness we are seeking but instead on a treadmill continually chasing but never attaining. We are held hostage by being kept out. We discover that we can never keep up nor can we ever have enough. Instead, we are constantly struggling to find the happiness we were promised. We are constantly seeking and it eludes us. We never catch it yet it causes some major problems.

Look at the epidemics we have currently with drug, porn and food addictions. We have bought in to the myth of hedonism that says we are to chase instant gratification because it gives us pleasure and helps us avoid pain (fear, depression, self-loathing, etc). Instant gratification (pleasure) bringing us happiness is a myth that has caused some of the biggest issues in our society today yet we enable and encourage it because of the lust for more our society constantly reinforces through the movies/television we watch, books/magazines we read and the music we listen to.  Never forget, great men plant seeds for trees they will never enjoy the shade of. The same is true in our lives, yet we remain focused mostly on ourselves and our wants.

The paradox of hedonism happens because we falsely associate happiness with self-pleasure. I have found that me chasing things to pleasure myself generally ends up in me being disappointed. Maybe not disappointed at first, but over time the pleasure stops. My addiction was great at first but over time due to my depleted neurotransmitters. I was not using to feel good, I was just using more and more so that I did not feel as bad.

True happiness is not found in material things. If I am unhappy with myself no amount of things will bring me extended pleasure. As soon as the pleasure has stopped, and it always does, I will have to chase it again. I find that my pursuit of pleasure is not done to bring happiness, but instead to numb my emotions or escape my feelings. Once it goes away, the problem is still there. The lie is that we can take something outside of ourselves (drugs, sex, food, power, money) to fix what is wrong inside of us. What we need is already inside of us.

The Holy Spirit can and will help guide us to properly fix that which is wrong with us. We may need counseling, support groups and accountability partners in order to do that. We will also need a game plan, be it 12 step or Biblical, to establish the direction we lean towards as we live our lives. Using those 5 Pillars of Recovery we will not only fix what may be broken or find what is missing, but we can begin to be happy with what we have instead of miserable about the things we don’t!

I don’t deal with lives problems to make myself happy, but instead because that is what responsible people do. Happiness is a result of my being content and satisfied with who I am. It comes from being comfortable being me. It comes from having a purpose and hope. Happiness comes from having a good support group of people that care about you for you. Happiness is not about having the most things but about making the most with what we have. Happiness comes from using what God has given  us to the best of our abilities and putting Him first!

What I have found to be true is that if I stay focused on God, everything else goes better. I am a better husband, father, employee and friend. I know the right thing to do, and I know the wrong thing to do. With the power that dwells inside of us we find ourselves doing more of the right thing and less of the wrong thing, which brings satisfaction and by proxy happiness. Even during the worst times and in the worst circumstances, I am confident in my salvation and I know the riches in store for me when I die.

Who could ask for anything more?